1985
Director- Andrew Sugerman

A Naïve young lady, Melinda from Ashtabulah (spelling anyone?) Ohio moves to Washington DC with grandiose ideas about doing great things for her government and country. She arrives at her new home to find her old friend balling some military guy. Add one more practically brain dead blonde nymphomaniac roommate and you have a star team of Pentagon Secretaries. Despite all her good intentions Melinda quickly discovers the sweaty underbelly of DC politics. The lieutenant for whom she works expects very little actual secretarial effort from her, but instead continuously attempts to ambush her pants and get her to take short hand with his short arm. Meanwhile her roommates slut around with just about every other male in the cast. A cleaning lady (at the Pentagon? Oh wait, realism went out the window with the pre credit strip and song routine) accidentally erases the entire Soviet Defense file from the Pentagon mainframe computer. Melinda gets fired from her job for refusing to put out, but schemes her way back into it by being deceptively sexually aggressive with the thickheaded Lieutenant, something his fragile ego can’t handle. It works for a time, and she is actually able to get some work done around the office, but soon, the Lt. flies off the aforementioned handle and tricks Melinda into a game of “POW” The MP’s save the day by arresting the loopy Lt., and Melinda uses her new powers of manipulation to move up the secretarial ladder. While at a high-class party she is introduced to Boris, the Soviet diplomat who takes a slavering decrepit interest in her top secrets. Melinda is kidnapped by the rebuffed Red, and taken to his room at the Soviet Embassy where she gets the idea to extract the lost top-secret Soviet defense plans by exposing her own topless-secrets.

Melinda is out of place as the semi-prudish good girl in the middle of a debauched decade of military overspending and sexual liberty. The film seems to half-heartedly extol her as a virtue of chastity and patriotic idealism but completely undermining that by simultaneously celebrating sex and stupidity. Am I over analyzing? Everyone in the movie has no problem in taking his or her clothes off, hey there’s even a 50-plus-person all-nude pool scene. But Melinda spends so much energy and time keeping hers on that you cant help but feel relieved when she finally gives in. An early Playboy production feels a lot like a National Lampoon movie with more boobs, and fewer jokes that work.

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